We don’t always get to think about ourselves in an optimistic or redeeming light. People in our lives can say and do things that we give meaning to in such a way that we start to think that who we are is problematic.
“Problems develop when people internalise conversations that restrain them to a narrow description of self. These stories are experienced as oppressive because they limit the perception of available choices.”
~ Kathleen S.G. Skott-Myhre ~
There is a vast difference between experiencing a problematic situation and feeling we are the problem. The identity conclusions we can arrive at limit our sense of who we are, what we will engage in and how we present ourselves to others. We censor ourselves and play into the narrow descriptions ascribed to us by others or by our own imagination. We have the power to change our story and to see how the events and people from our past can be catalysts for becoming something wonderful.
Narrative practice uses the technique of creating a list of wonderfulness. We can start to list out the qualities and abilities that make us remarkable. They might be unique to us or indeed might be an overlooked advantage of what we gained from a really tough event in our lives.
As we become aware of ourselves as storytellers, we realise we can use our stories to heal and make ourselves whole.
~Susan Wittig Albert~
When we take the time to reflect on the attributes, values and wisdoms we have acquired over time we can start to see how these qualities can be tremendous allies in supporting us to be a worthy advisory to the problems and challenges we have to face. These abilities may render our problems less powerful and empower us to step into the identities that better displays just how wonderful we are!
Our program, Made Better Stories [insert link] guides people through a narratively informed approach that gets you thinking about how you narrate your life and what stories you have about yourself that are empowering and which ones are potentially limiting. Our module on Restorative Stories [insert link] provides you with a process that gets you to explore the wonderful qualities you possess, which will support you in transforming problematic stories into stories of empowerment.
If you’d like to explore how you can use life events to restore your sense of self, why not reach out to Made Better Human and find out more about the Made Better Stories program. Or you might like to register for the Restorative Stories module where you’ll get to focus on how your stories have defined some of your identity conclusions. We’d love to have you be part of this empowering process.